Funny Quotes on Tiger Woods Car Accident

The internet can be so full of wild stuffs. Take world-famous golfer Tiger Woods for example. His latest car crash and affair boo-boo landed him on the front page of every newspapers and the internet does not spare him either.

Numerous quotes, or rather puns, have been sprouting everywhere and making fun at Tiger Woods' expense. Websites like this and this have compiled so many funny quotes that makes for a quick laugh.

I have put some quotes below for reference:

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Tiger's rear view mirror has a new warning: ANGRY WIVES ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR

The bruise on Tiger's forehead spells "Nike" backwards.

Nike has announced a new line of clubs for jealous wives.

Even the world's best golfer can't get out of every lie.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a golf ball over 300 yards.

What club did Elin use to "rescue" Tiger? A bitching wedge.

Phil Mickelson has already called Elin to get some tips on how to beat Tiger.

Tiger hit a tree and a fire hydrant. He had trouble deciding between a wood and an iron.

The police asked Elin how many times she hit Tiger. She said, "Put me down for a five."

Tiger explained the injuries to his face by telling the police that he's a scratch golfer.

Tiger's sponsor, Gillette, is upset because Tiger said the accident was the closest shave he's ever had.

Elin found out her husband's not a Tiger, he's a cheetah.

Tiger put the fault of the accident on his Escalade, which is typical of a golfer -- always blame the Caddy.

Did you make it out of your own driveway safely this morning? Then you can say that you outdrove Tiger Woods.

Did you hear about Tiger's last outing? He drove into a tree, then ended up with a bad lie.

What do baby seals and Tiger Woods have in common? They've both been clubbed by Scandinavians.

 I think Tiger needs a new driver, his current shaft keeps getting him in trouble!

I read that the PGA are now investigating Tiger for having too many "woodies" in his bag!

After scoring a couple of beautiful birdies earlier on, Tiger finds himself in serious trouble at the last hole, coming home.

Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par.

What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing. 

 Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.

If Elin really did whack Tiger a couple of times with a golf club, it would have been in line with the rules of golf: there's a 2-stroke penalty for playing the wrong hole.

Hey Adidas, this is Tiger, Nike found your number in my phone. I need you to change your name...
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Laugh at Tiger's expense! Wahaha!  
   

Japanese Pop Star Drunk in Park

Whoa, a member of the hugely popular Japanese boyband, SMAP, has been arrested for being drunk and naked in a park near the Roppongi district.

Neighbours called in the police after they discovered Tsuyoshi Kusanagi was being rowdy and he was taken into custody soon after.

When I googled his name to see how he look like, I was very surprised to see that it was this guy below:




He acted in several popular Japanese TV dramas when I was in secondary school and I enjoyed watching him in those shows. He projected such a squeaky clean image that it was hard to reconcile with the scandal that has tarnished his image beyond repair.

Reports stated that several commercials starring him were dropped and brands like Toyota also dropped him as their ambassador.

Now the public are waiting to see if he would be charged with public indecency despite that he's a big star in Japan. Big star or not, that kind of behaviour is simply not acceptable in Japan. If it happens in the West, then he would probably be let off with a warning but he wasn't.

Stars these days are in the news for all the wrong reasons and no wonder they get so much flak. Anyway I rarely watch TV shows these days. Animes are my obsession and so do mangas. These mediums carry no real human images, only drawings so I guess I'm pretty weird.

=D

John Travolta's Son Died

I was just watching Entertainment Tonight on Channel 5 earlier on and its headline for the day was on the death of John Travolta's son, Jett Travolta.

According to TMZ.com, Jett passed away on 3rd January 2009 after he suffered a seizure fit when he fell and hit his head in the bathroom while on vacation. Videos of the young Jett was shown on TV and the little boy looked so cute.

John Travolta with son, Jett.

Travolta was visibly seen trying to contain his sorrow while appearing strong for his family. He had tried to revive his son using CPR but it was too late for the boy. His wife, Kelly Preston, was reported to be crying non-stop after she learnt of his death.

May Jett's soul rest in peace and condolences to both John Travolta and his wife, Kelly Preston.

Whoa! Robert Pattison in USA Today's Top 100 People List

Harry Potter's Page has posted that Robert Pattison has just made it to the USA Today's Top 100 People list this year.

Pattison is placed at number 20 on the list. Reason is listed as follows:

His glistening skin distracted millions of teen girls this year, and it's safe to say the Twilight franchise will transform the actor into a superstar. Even if the sequel bites, Pattison's hair is a box-office cash machine.

So, will he be able to match Daniel Radcliffe of the Harry Potter movie franchise? It remains to be seen as Radcliffe is not included in the list this year. This is probably due to the fact that the latest Harry Potter film's release has been pushed back to July 2009 and so, his influence is not as great as Pattison's this year. After all, Stephenie Meyer's vampire series has hogged the limelight this year and it's no surprise that the movie will do the same.

On a side note, the HP Page also reported that Pattison had just recently cut his famous Twilight hair into a super short cut. Here's a comparison of his hair:

Before: His famous Twilight haircut.


After: His new super short haircut. Btw, those words are not written by me.

I could still remember the time when he was first cast as Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. He was quite a relatively unknown actor before being casted in the Harry Potter movie. Here's how he looked while portrayed as Cedric:




Heh heh... he certainly looks very different back then, eh? Now with the enormous success of Twilight, his career can only go up and up. Besides, I doubt he could return back to the Harry Potter franchise movies as his character, Cedric Diggory, had already been killed off in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, though he still appeared in flashbacks in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

Will we be seeing more of this rising young star? I think so but he has to be careful not to be typecast permanently as Edward Cullen. Otherwise, he would never be recognised as anything else except as Edward. That would be a disaster for an actor, I believe.

Look at Daniel Radcliffe. He has since branched out to act in other movies such as December Boys and also acted in musicals such as Equus. Thus, Radcliffe proved to the critics that he is not just a one-time boy wonder but a serious thespian to be reckon with.

Too bad I won't be able to see Equus as it is currently not staged in Asia. Hmmm... Besides, the naked scenes would have made it impossible to premiere in conservative Singapore's theatres.

So, between the 2 guys, who will prevail? For me, I will always support Radcliffe as I am very impressed with his performance in the Harry Potter movie franchise. As for Pattison, his acting is nah. Oops.

There you go. My few cents worth. Keke....

Twilight Gallery

For those who are wanting more of Twilight's cast, I have found a gallery which has quite a number of pictures which mostly includes Robert Pattison and Kristen Stewart.

Click here for the site.

Most of the pictures are taken on the set of Twilight and some of them featured light-hearted moments between the 2 main leads. A sample is posted below:




So go feast your eyes on the pictures and hopefully more pictures of the movie premiere can posted online too.

Kudos to the web!

Boring Superman

After watching the TV premiere of Superman Returns on Channel 5, I can only conclude in one word: Boring.

The film ran way too long with the plot going nowhere in the first half of the film. It ding dong between the past and the present of Superman's life. Then the super bad guy turns out to be, well, not very bad after all. Though this bad guy does have the ambition of killing billions of people with a newly created landmass that contains kryptonite and will destroy Earth's existing continents. Thus making Lex Luthor into the new owner of such a landmass.

The film starts to get a little better at the back with some action but then it drags again towards the part about the love triangle between Superman, Lois Lane and Richard White. Superman seems to get it easy all the time. Plus he always manage to get to the dangerous situations at the right time to save people.

This is unlike Spiderman, who has to fight conflicts within himself for most of the time even though he's a hero. For Spiderman, it would always be "with great power comes great responsibility". For Superman, I only see his pain at losing Lois Lane. Hmmm... nothing much to compare here between the 2 heroes.

Although I do wish that Superman would clear up his dress sense and start to wear his underwear inside his clothes. It looks so weird sticking out.

All in all, this movie is pretty average and does not really impress me much. I would still prefer to watch Spiderman movies over this Superman anytime.

Here I come, Peter Parker and Tobey Maguire!

Twilight director won't return for Sequel

According to this report, Twilight's director, Catherine Hardwicke would not be returning to direct its sequel, New Moon.

It was quoted as saying that due to timing differences, Hardwicke had to bow out of the commitment. Some say that Summit Entertainment wanted to do the sequel as soon as possible, given that the current Twilight movie is doing extremely well at the box office.

For Hardwicke, whose previous films include Thirteen and Lords of Dogtown, had the highest opening ever for a female director when Twilight made nearly $70 million in its first weekend. It has grossed over $138 million in three weeks.

Twilight will officially open in Singapore on 18 December 2008 and that's when I will be watching it along with maomao. She's very excited over the movie though she has been claiming otherwise.

So for me, it remains to be seen whether the film is really that good or I should just concentrate on Harry Potter, whose next film release will be in July 2009. Boy, that's such a long, long time. Warner Bros better catch up quickly if they want to beat the Twinkies in their movie debut. Hee...

=(

F.I.R. Concert! w00t!

Last night mayi and I went to F.I.R. first world tour concert at Singapore Indoor Stadium. Initially I hadn't taken notice of their concert but when mayi asked me whether I want to attend the concert, I agreed without hesitation.

When F.I.R. first came out in year 2004 with their debut album, I was immediately attracted by their unique music arrangement and Faye's excellent voice. I loved all the songs on the debut album and that was a first for me in recent years. Only Jay Chou has the ability to make fall in love with all his songs. ^_^

Now, fast forward to year 2008. With 4 albums under their belts, F.I.R. has indeed come a long way since their debut days. Their trial and errors with the experiments of music led them to their highs and lows in their music career but through it all, they gritted their teeth and might to finish their journey.

Last but not least, Faye and Real had found true love within each other and it was a joyous occasion when Real proposed to Faye last Christmas. Indeed, everyone had been so happy for the lovebirds and that love shone throughout the concert as well. I am very honored to be part of their joy.

For the most part, I sat quietly through the concert as my seating area is not the crazy fans' arena so thank god I was able to enjoy the concert in peace for the most part.

As expected, F.I.R. performed all the crowd favourite songs which had garnered them huge scale of popularity.

Lydia... Fly Away... Get High... so much more!

Faye looked respledent in her white costume and later when she changed into a gold costume, she truly looked like a queen who has come of age.

To see the pictures that I took during the concert, go to this link. Once again, the quality of the pictures are not that good as my camera does not take night shots very well. It totally sucked at that. Pui!

Then there's the zoom issue too. The 3x zooming feature is not enough to capture F.I.R. closely at all. The only one shot that was close had been based on digital zoom, not optical zoom, so the picture quality suffered. Damn...

Overall the concert was a rousing success for F.I.R. and fans couldn't have asked for more than this. Truly.

Harry Potter Stars to Attend Teen's Funeral

According to Telegraph, Daniel Radcliffe and other Harry Potter stars will be attending Robert Knox' funeral, who was tragically killed on May 16 in a knife attack.

Daniel Radcliffe as Harry Potter in the upcoming Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

It will no doubt be a sombre affair but at the same time, it's touching to know that Dan and the other stars are paying their respects to a barely known star. Such an amazing display of camaradie is indeed heartwarming.

May Robert Knox rest in peace.

Clay for Real?

According to this report, Clay Aiken is going to be a daddy with his best friend, whom the report identifies as Jaymes Foster. I have no idea how true this report is as news coming from Hollywood tends to be very exaggerated.

In fact, I had just read about Clay in yesterday's copy of TODAY and he's quite tired of having those gay questions directed at him. For the record, I think he looks pretty normal, gay or otherwise.

C'mon, give the guy a break and let him make nice music. I think that's all he wants from the world. Gay? Going to be a daddy?

Give it a rest. ^.^

Filthy Rich Hollywood Stars Waste Money on New House

According to That Other Blog, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are apparently spending a cool $60 million on a French residence which is supposed to come with 35 rooms, a vineyard, moat, lake and forest, and even ponies on demand.

That's extravagance in super luxurious Hollywood. And stupid as well. The maintenance and upkeep of the estate is going to be costly too. Looks like these Hollywood celebrities are spending their money the way Singaporeans are littering the streets. A big WASTE.

Everything in Hollywood makes no sense at all. Those $60 million (US$ or not, it's still a lot of money!) could very well be put to good use by donating to the twin Asian disasters, the Sichuan Earthquake and the Myanmar Cyclone. So many people in need of help. Such a wasteful way of using money.

All for the cause of additional 2 Brangelina kiddos. *smacks forehead*

GOD!!!